Quick update that I should have gotten around to three days ago: The funeral is on Wednesday. I will be flying out at 6am tomorrow and will return on Friday. I have not checked LJ since Thursday and will not be checking it until post Sunday. I apologise for anything I have or will miss during my absence.

Now, proof that I really do write to keep myself calm and sane, I sat down and write a short, COMPLETELY TRUE comedy piece. I don’t do comedy well or often, so hopefully you’ll all enjoy this one. No editing feedback requested. Maybe if you like this, you can link some friends.

This morning my mother woke me up at about 6:45am getting the dogs out of my bedroom.

I flailed around and called her back and said: “Did you see that?”

And she said: “What?”

I said: “That girl. There was a little girl in my room. She had blonde hair and she was wearing a blue dress with white spots. She smiled at me.”

My mother told me I was dreaming.

My father just called me and told me my grandmother died this morning at 6:45.

I am, of course, devastated. She’s been unwell with the flu, but this was quite unexpected and sudden. She did pass quietly in her sleep though. There was no distress or pain and I hope I’m lucky enough to go like she did.

Thank you in advance for your condolences. Also, please note I will be away Saturday through to mid week, as I need to fly to NSW for the funeral.

Okay, time to get this writing journal back on track. Grin.

I’ve been meaning to post an excerpt for a while, so here are just under 1000 words from my current WIP.

It is the opening scene and as far as opening scenes go, I think it’s one of my best.

Feedback is welcome—particularly grammatical/spelling errors. I’m not sure about the character names, they may change at this point. If you like/don’t like them let me know so I can make an informed decision about future changes.

Okay, tell me if I’m wrong here because I’m starting to feel crazy.

I have made two assumptions which I thought were both logical and polite, but it seems they have deeply offended some people.

Firstly: I assume that if people want me to have information about their personal lives, they will tell me themselves.

Secondly: I assume that it would wrong to ask mutual friends and family to give me details about other people’s personal lives, as it would likely make the middle man uncomfortable and be an invasion of privacy for the person I was inquiring about.

Is there anyone else out there who is deeply offended I don’t know a heap of stuff they haven’t told me? Does anyone else want me to ask other people to forward personal emails to me?

I mean, if I knew ‘taking an interest’ in people meant stalking them, I could have bugged people’s phones and read their mail.... I don’t mind doing it. Really. I just thought it would be, you know, creepy. And criminal.

These are actually really inappropriate things to expect me to do, right? I seriously feel like I’m in the twilight zone right now.

Times people have broken into/attempted to break into my house: 3.

Times people have attempted to mug/attack me: 5

Restraining orders I’ve held against people who had documents planning the abduction and murder of my family members: 1.

I watch a lot of thrillers and horrors. I’ve seen a lot of real life violence. I’ve been threatened with a lot of real life violence. In fact, I just finished a great novel by Karin Slaughter about women being kidnapped, crucified and raped.

I do not react well to being forced out of the shower, without my glasses, wrapped only in a towel, to find a man built like a WWF fighter covered in prison and biker tattoos fighting with my dog in my yard.

I originally said this as a comment over on augustuscaesar journal, but I decided it was entertaining enough to cross post.

For those of you curious, the following occurred at 7am while I was trying to check my emails. It highlights the daily hazards I encounter:

*black smoke is billowing from vacuum*

Tag: "Ah! Stop it! The vacuum is on fire!"

Mum: "It's fine."

Tag: "It's burning!"

Mum: "I think that's your computer."

TAG: "It's not the computer! You're getting burning plastic smoke in my face! Take it outside!"

*ten minutes late she comes back holding a charred vacuum filter*

Mum: "Turns out is WAS burning!"

*Tag is weeping softly in the corner*

Yesterday I had a really nice conversation with someone about gardening and growing vegetables. It was one of those in depth talks that makes you feel really good and I woke up this morning keen to email the person again and talk about gardening some more.

Then I realised the whole conversation was a dream and the person didn’t actually exist.

I feel really bad about this. Not sad, but guilty like I’ve been really rude. How do you say sorry for something like that?

“Hey, I really enjoyed our talk the other day, by the way I’m so sorry I woke up and you ceased to be real.”

In an unrelated note, a barn owl attacked me in the middle of a mall in broad daylight on Saturday. That kind of thing does NOT happen to other people. The Tag Effect is in full swing.  I’ve always been a little weirded out by owls too.

Okay, so time for an update.

Firstly, my move went well and I am settling in to life in Cairns. It’s beautiful here, much moreso than I remember. A few doors down from me there is a creek with baby salt water crocodiles in it. I’m two streets from the beach and our yard is often inhabited by red clawed mud crabs and massive pink geckos are everywhere. I’ve set up a vegie garden now there are no brush tail possums and I’m growing herbs, vegetables and fruits.

Secondly, I have not been able to get on LJ until recently and even when I could get on LJ, I wasn’t getting any alerts when people replied or commented. I have fixed both of these problems and am back on LJ with force. Some of you will have noticed over the past couple of days, as I’ve been commenting on entries again.

Thirdly, I’d like to update you all on my current writing projects and where they stand:

‘I, Aratika’ my 90, 000 word fantasy novel is still signed with my agent, Wendy Barnard, and is under consideration at two publishing houses.

‘Lifesphere INC’ my 40, 000 word YA novel is still signed with my agent, Wendy Barnard, and is still being edited.

I finished my horror novel, which I hope to sell under a pen name, and it is being considered by two New York based literary agents.

Last month I started two new novels, which I am writing simultaneously at the moment, as I can’t decide which one to focus on. One is a steampunk political fantasy thingie with romance and royalty and guns and monkeys—the working title is ‘Boneshire’, however I’ve been thinking ‘All That Glitters’ is actually more fitting. Titles are really not a big concern for me in the first draft stage, though, to be honest.

The second is... ummm. Unmarketable? Is that a genre? Grin. Actually it’s not that bad. Apart from the fact it’s written in first person present tense, so maybe it IS that bad... The setting and characters are to die for though, so who knows. It’s currently called Babylon, but that will change as Babylon is much to overused for my taste. It’s dystopian, violent and darkly apathetic. The main character is uneducated and directionless, but none the less, determined to break the mould. It’s Kazuaki Kiriya’s Casshern meets China Mieville’s Perdido Street Station.

If I had any sense, I wouldn’t write this one, but this one is for me. It’s fun, it’s beautifully perverse. I’m okay if when I finish it, I can’t do anything with it. If nothing else, maybe writing it will stop me having dreams about the setting, because while it’s fun to visit, I can tell you right now you don’t want to live there.

I’m back and leaping in with both feet with some sad news, which deviates into a writing lecture.

A few days ago I got a phone call from a friend from Melbourne who was just calling to catch up and see how my move had gone. We used to be in a drama troupe together, and at the time the group was very tight knit.

So it was during this phone call I learnt that I’d lost another friend to suicide.

The young man was extremely talented. He and his brother attended the troupe together and though I hadn’t spoken to either of them in a while, I expected to see them any day—having landed a part in some TV show or movie. I couldn’t imagine either of them falling short of that goal.

I was sad, upon hearing that news and paused to remember all the hilarious moments we shared together in rehearsals and performances. To be honest it slipped from my mind then, though I have been unusually tired ever since. However since getting my computer up and running again I have been trying to catch up on the TV I’ve missed.

Episode 20, season 5 of House deals with suicide. I was fine throughout the episode, until the last thirty seconds. The last shot of Dr Taub in the hallway broke me completely as some part of me accepted that he was dead. Not the character, but the young man I knew who was on his way to being a brilliant actor.

When you suffer some kind of trauma—particularly a death—it can be hard to feel. Sometimes you don’t hurt at all, at first. Sometimes you keep it bottled for years and suddenly there is a trigger, you find that hurt and it all comes out again. It took me two years to mourn for a simular lost friend; I didn’t even know the pain was there until I found a funny note he’d written me.

I think this is a function of fiction and entertainment media that is often overlooked. We live vicariously through characters to make our own lives more interesting, but we can also mourn through them. We can experience loss vicariously to dull the sting of reality.

When you choose to write about death or suffering; suicide, rape, divorce or illness, you should write with the understanding that others will be facing their own demons when they read it. They’ve experience the things you may only be writing about and you should be careful about how you choose to manipulate that.

I’m not saying every painful scene should be a hallmark moment, but you shouldn’t handle things carelessly. If you want to hurt, horrify, disgust or succour your readers, do it intentionally. And do it with some restraint.

My cheeks are still wet. He was only eighteen.

Heads up, everyone.

I'm moving house--finally. We’re actually now headed to Cairns instead of Coffs Habour. Only about 300kms of difference there. :P

 The removalists arrive on Wednesday and I'll be spending all tomorrow (Tuesday) saying goodbye to family. We start driving Thursday, arrive Saturday and the internet will be connected some time in the week after that. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

So the computer is being packed tonight and I won't be back online for ten days at the soonest--longer if Telstra screws me.

When I arrive I’ll invite ya’ll to email me and get my new address, if you need it. If you need my mobile number before then, well... you’re in trouble. I’m deeply sorry to everyone in Melbourne that I didn’t find the time to see ANY of you before I left.

I am made of fail.

Try not to kill each other/yourselves before I get back.

Hey all, just a quick update to link you to a neat website sinewandbones (Who gets no link because it keeps destroying my page) linked me to:

Authonomy.com

It’s a website run by HarperCollin’s UK, for people to post their novels for other people to read. If you like a novel you can put it on your bookshelf, but your bookshelf only holds five books, so you have to be picky. At the end of the month the twenty books that are on the most people’s shelves are read by editors at HarperCollin’s UK.

I have a profile there, but my books aren’t on it. However if you set up a profile, link me and I’ll check out your work. I suggest not uploading your whole book on the site, by the way. However you need to upload a minimum of 10, 000 words.

The big con of this site is that ultimately you’re going to have to give a lot of reviews if you would like other people to read your work. However if you have the time to invest in the site, then it’s a little better than just submitting to the slush pile at the same publisher.

A friend of mine from college also wrote this article on rape in fiction. It’s geared toward people writing horror and fiction, be they novels or scripts. I’m inclined to agree with much of what she says—however obviously there are exceptions to the rule, such as Silence of the Lambs. It’s an interesting article, as long as you’re not sensitive to swearing.

Victoria is burning.

I assume most of you know this already, as the news and stats are being passed around quite vigorously. Over 750 homes destroyed, 3700+ homeless and with the death toll expected to pass 230. As I write this the confirmed death toll is 173, however for the last few days this has been increasing just about every time I turn on the radio or update ninemsn.

I’m safe. My house is safe. I’m a long way from the (serious) fires, though there have been small fires as close as a few hundred meters from my place. There is so much fuel on the hill I live on. We’re a cigarette butt away from being the next casualties—if not this year, next year. On Saturday I stayed up watching the lightning strike a few kilometers from the house and waited to see flames.

ABC radio has been doing constant coverage. The news is bad, but the radio is worse. There is so much horror. I’m not even on the ground there and the things I’ve heard have left me in shock and mourning. There are friends I can not contact from towns that now don’t exist. There are people I know who have lost homes.

There have been stories about a father who put his kids in the car, ran back into the house and came out to find the car on fire and his children burning alive. A man who tried to stay and defend his house but decided to leave when he saw cows burning alive in the paddock beside his house. A man in a wheelchair was unable to flee his house in Bendigo. A woman was fighting spot fires in her yard and turned around to find her house on fire—her two children died inside. Burnt and blind livestock is everywhere. Thousands and thousands of hectares of wildlife is dead and burnt out.

I am so gutted by this, I can’t even imagine what it must be like for the people involved.

My mother and I had already been having talks about moving. The southern half of Australia is going to keep getting hotter due to global warming. Its possible bushfires like this could happen again—as soon as next year. So on Saturday we started packing. We sat down, decided where we were going and started searching for places to rent there. I expect to be out of Victoria by the end of April—however between packing and moving, you won’t see much of me online at all.

On a writing related note, the novel I have been obsessed with an in love with for the past month centers around bushfires. I think about it now and wonder if or when I will be able to face that topic again. I’m on another temporary writing hiatus, at least until the idea of writing about fires doesn’t make me physically nauseous.

Time for an update I think, before I scare anyone else.

Health wise I am slowly recovering. My skin has mostly grown back, I can walk again, my GGT is dropping (slowly)—so overall I’m past the danger zone. I’m still very weak and tired and a few minutes in the sun is enough to make me blister like an egg in a fry-pan, however bar some minor scarring I have no permanent damage.

However I saw the soft tissue specialist yesterday and he is expected the TMJ to be a problem for a further twelve months, which is a long time to be virtually crippled/unable to eat etc. You win some, you lose some.

Writing-wise, as some of you may have picked up, I’ve been working on a horror story based on a dream I had. It’s been amazing. Every time I sit down to work on it I write 2000 words plus. This is epic for me, as I am typically a slow writer. I haven’t been able to write everyday—if I had it would be finished by now—as I still have so many appointments with doctors. However I think I had forgotten writing could be like this. Maybe it’s never been like this for me. I used to average 1500 words, so this is a clear step up.

Writing, at its best, really is heaven.

Now, just for fun, here are some things I am in love with as of this minute in no particular order:

1. The novel I am working on. My ego is now too big to fit through doors. This manuscript is made of awesome.

2. The United States of Tara. I was dubious as hell before watching this one, however Toni Collette works MAGIC. And she’s Australian too. I’m praying this series does well because I’ve seen one episode and I’m already keen for series two. Also: Diablo Cody for the win, people.

3. Death Race. I love me some sci fi, baby! A very straightforward plot, good pacing and remarkably likeable characters make this movie a worthwhile way to spend a few hours. If you watch it and hate it, I don’t care. I make no apologies. I think it’s awesome.

4. Keira Knightley. Yeah, I rediscovered Keira Knightley again and am obsessively collecting images of her. I’ve just realized she’s a few months younger than me, which somehow makes her more awesome.

5. http://www.wajasdev.com/. Probably the most addictive website/game I have ever come across. If you like breeding or animal sims, you will spend the rest of your life here and probably starve to death in front of the computer.

If anyone else has an account and wajas that I don’t know about, let me know! And if you join and decide to stay, let me know so I can stick you on my f-list there and give you free stuff.

Anyone else have a love list? Anyone else sharing mine? How is everyone’s writing going? I have so much to catch up on!

A huge thanks to everyone who has sent concerned emails and made concerned phone calls and livejournal posts. When you’re sick it means a lot to know that people are missing you and worried about you.

There’s an update under the cut, it has photos. You have been warned.

I’m hoping to spend the 12^th (my 24^th Birthday) at Werribee Zoo taking photos of hippos. Kind of... alone. But it’s better than being home alone. And I’m hoping to have a get together on the 17^th in the CBD with some friends—just lunch and general mocking of my appearance.

Hopefully I’ll get to contact everyone about the 17^th today. Hopefully a few people can actually come. :/
 

I apologize this post took so long. I AM home and out of hospital, it’s just particularly bad news any my condition has continued to worsen.

So, in summary I have an often fatal disease, my parrot is dead and I can’t have a birthday.

I’m not going to be commenting on LJ either. As much as I love you all--which I do, very very much—my hands have 70% blister coverage and typing this was like repeatedly dipping my hands in hot oil. I’m still going to try and read everything and if you want feedback to something specific, maybe you can link to it here and I’ll try and reply when I’m better. I’ll also slowly work through replying to comments.

*HUGS ALL*

Sigh.

I’m on my way to emergency now. You just... don’t even want to know.

I’ll edit this post when I get back, unless I end up in there for more than 24 hours, then I’ll post a new one.

I don’t think I can be friends with anyone who has children anymore.

Guess what I’ll be doing tonight?

Nothing!

I have hand, foot and mouth disease. I kid you not. Hand, foot and mouth disease. And I’m 24 in 12 days.

My doctor had never even seen hand, foot and mouth, let alone on a 24 year old. He called in just about everyone else in the building to consult. (For the record, they mostly just laughed at me.)

This probably beats TMJ on the stupid illness front.

To make it more exciting, I’ve got the rarer, more dangerous strain Enterovirus 71. Which, to quote wiki: “also has the potential to cause severe neurological disease.”

There is no treatment for this.

On the up side, over the past four days I’ve written 9000 words. That’s officially more than I wrote in all of October and November combined. It’s probably the severe neurological disease kicking in, eh?

WRITERS AND EDITORS!

I need your opinions urgently.

I’ve mentioned to a few people that three days ago I started writing a new novel. I’m at six thousand words already because I love it far more than person in their right mind loves anything.

However I am having a continued problem that needs to be addressed NOW and not at ten thousand words.

I have been trying to write the book in third person, because I generally find people prefer third person and find first person rather annoying. However I have not written a SINGLE SENTANCE of this novel without realizing I’ve written it in first person and being forced to go back and change it. I thought I’d have settled into third by now, but I’m still doing it.

Clearly the novel knows what it wants. It wants to be first person.

Do I trust the novel and make life easy or do I use common sense and stick with third person?

Fat Man at the end of the World is an anthology for those of us who know beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. The focus is on overweight heroes saving the day, getting the girl and watching all those stick thin people blow away in a strong breeze.

It’s been put together by my good friend   luciusmalfoy    and if it makes a few bucks she might do it next year and make an annual thing out of it. It’s only a dollar and it would make a great gift.

http://www.lulu.com/content/5287986

Okay, so both of those stories were more ‘horrifying’ than funny, but they made ME laugh.

For health reasons I’ve decided to take the rest of the year off from serious writing.

My agent announced she was on break until the 5^th of January today, so it’s probably a good time for me to do the same without feeling guilty.

I’m sure I’ll still be writing, but it won’t be anything of a publishable caliber. For example  kagechikara will be getting a fic for Christmas and I plan on making it quite long.

Hopefully this will give me time to recharge my creative battery. I hope to do a lot of reading, art, cooking and maybe play with some other creative projects, like the Diannis Legacy and Comix!.

I’ve always found writing breaks to be very therapeutic. The last one I had was in 2005 and lasted for two weeks. It’s kept me going all this time, but I think I’m due another one. Then, hopefully, I’ll be able to start the new year with some bumper writing days (and maybe some good news?) and life will be back on track.

I will still be around on LJ. I might even have time to post some new tutorials.

So, how about the rest of you? Resting or writing this silly season?